Here it comes, your kid has reached the “let-me-go-to-the-party” age, and you are torn between the desire to save your kid from trouble and give them enough freedom. Teen parties are a source of anxiety and worry for adults because they probably remember their own experiences and constantly anticipate the worst development of events. However, it’s rather a reason for joy because not everything is that bad, it’s an excellent way to help them meet and socialize outside the virtual reality.
It’s obvious that you don’t want to let them go to the party, because in your imagination it’s a disaster with alcohol, drugs, and trips somewhere unknown. However, you can’t keep the kids loсked in the house, as they need to learn the world and how to behave. Besides, as it often happens, when forbidden to do some things, teenagers will double their desire and resistance, leading to even more problems.
When giving your permission, it’s important to set the rules and boundaries and discuss them with the kids. As they need to understand their responsibilities as well. Here are some guidelines to help you.
Basic Rules
- Reasonable curfew – depends on the age and season (daytime varies in summer and winter)
- No alcohol and no drugs – that’s an absolute taboo. It’s worth discussing it in detail, pointing out all the negative consequences it can lead to.
- Availability of address and phone number of the hosting family.
- Adults’ presence, at least one.
Consequences
Right after establishing the rules, you need to notify the teens about the consequences if the rules are broken. Be very specific about that and avoid general phrases like “you will see what I will do”, and “you will be grounded”. For instance, if the curfew is disregarded, then they will have even shorter time limits; if they leave the place without permission, they will be restrained from partying for a certain period of time, etc.
Coming up with the type of punishment after the harm is done is a losing strategy as well. The kids must be responsible for their actions., if they break the rules intentionally, they are fully aware of what will follow up.
Location
Parties can sometimes move on outside, thus, being aware of the child’s location is essential. Obviously, sending you a real-time location will be embarrassing and will ruin all the freedom and independence mood. However, there is a better solution – installing the third-party application, which will send you notifications about the child’s location. Find My Kids Official Website offers you an efficient way to deal with all the inconveniences and anxiety by installing their app, as its main features are truly practical:
- It will send messages about a location to your phone,
- Your grown-up kid can send SOS signals if something goes wrong,
- You can listen to the surrounding of the place. /li>
Such control simplifies everything, giving you peace of mind, and lets the kid enjoy the party, instead of feeling obliged to send the reports about location.
Host Parents
Talk to the host parents, and make sure there will be adults at the party who are responsible and have zero tolerance for alcohol or drug usage. Besides, they need to control the party flow, just to make sure everything is okay.
It’s important to be on the same wavelength about the rules of the parties – if your worries are met with irony, it may be a bad sign and the reason to reduce the invitation. “NO” means ‘no’
Your grown-up needs to learn to say ‘no’, as there’s always a chance that something will be brought to the party just to try out of curiosity. Thus, it’s important to teach the kids to build their defenses and to keep to their principles. Oftentimes it’s the only way to avoid a trouble-making course of events.
Transportation
Transportation to and from the party must be agreed upon in advance. The best variant is you or another trusted parent. If this idea isn’t feasible due to some reasons, remind your teen that under no circumstances should they ever have a ride with a person who is under the influence of alcohol or drugs.
Besides, there should always be a backup plan. In case events take a wrong turn of events, your child must be sure you will be at his beck and call regardless of the time or inconveniences.
Partying is a part and parcel of the teenage period, it’s the way to communicate, unwind, make friends, and build confidence and independence. The majority of parents are worried about their kids, and the majority of kids crave some freedom and independence. You can’t ban your children from quality time with friends, as it will create walls of misunderstanding in your relationship and provoke rebelliousness. Discuss and agree on the rules, set the boundaries, and give kids a chance to grow, experience the fun of young age, and, be able to deal with unwelcoming situations.
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