Why are best friendships between girls so complicated? Can best friendships morph and survive as one grows up or do best friendships that have begun at a young age get stuck in a pattern of behavior that keeps the relationship in a dysfunctional time warp? I wish that I knew the answer to that.
I have polled my mom friends and some have best friendships that have lasted a few decades. Others, myself included, not so much. One lovely mom friend who is incredible on every front (gorgeous! funny! nice! intelligent!) said that she never had a best friend growing up, only a circle of very, very good friends (just like what men do!). It blew my mind that this was a girl option! But it makes so much sense to not have all your eggs in one basket. Oh, if I knew then what I know now…
These children’s books have best friend issues that run the gamut from The Big Fight to adjusting to the ups and downs of life’s interruptions whether that is a tsunami or puberty. Just like in real life. I hope these books help to illustrate to your children who may be going through ups and downs with their friendships that healthy friendships have ebbs and flows.
10 Children’s Books about Best Friend Issues
10. Best, Best Friends by Margaret Chodos-Irvine
When your best friend in preschool gets a lot of attention because it’s her birthday, it’s hard not to be jealous and say something mean. Luckily best friends understand about bad days and the friendship is easily repaired. This book is perfect for preschool girls in the throes of an ever-changing friendship dynamic with one close friend. Girl drama; it starts really early! [picture book, ages 2 and up]
9. 11 Birthdays by Wendy Mass
Your best friend is a boy and you’ve always celebrated your birthdays together since you were born since you have the same birthday. But this year, it’s different. VERY different. You are fighting with your best friend and it’s the first separate birthday party you’ve ever had. And it’s not even fun. But guess what? It’s Ground Hog Day (as in the movie), and you get to relive this day over and over again until you get it right. [middle grade, ages 8 and up]
8. Summer Sisters by Judy Blume
Sometimes best friendships change over time. Caitlin’s world opens up with she meets Vix who comes from a family of privilege, and they become inseparable friends one summer on Martha’s Vineyard. Six summers go by and the girls change, as teenage girls do, and their friendship inevitably does too. [young adult, ages 12 and up]
7. You’re Not My Best Friend Anymore by Charlotte Pomerantz
Molly lives upstairs with her father and mother in a two-family. Ben lives downstairs with his father and his aunt. She’s Caucasian. He’s African-American. Their birthdays are 10 days apart so they celebrate them together. They are best friends until that bad day when they fight over what kind of tent they should buy with all the allowance they’ve saved: pup tent versus umbrella tent. But it all works out in the end! [picture book, ages 6 and up]
6. Chester’s Way by Kevin Henkes
Two young boy mice who are best friends think that there is only one way (a very precise way) to do things. But when Lily moves in, she’s so different from them, they try to avoid her. But when she saves them from bullies, they realize that there is more than one way to slice a sandwich and that Lily’s strange ways are rip-roaring fun. [picture book, ages 4 and up]
5. Introducing … Sasha Abramowitz by Sue Halpern
Sasha Abramowitz has a lot on her plate. She has to see a therapist to deal with her brother who has Tourette’s Syndrome and lives in a boarding school. Her best friend seems more interested in hanging out with a boy than with her. Her babysitter is the brother she wished she had. And then everything goes upside down when, Danny, her brother abruptly moves home to their dorm. Oh yes, did I mention she’s on a college campus with her parents? [middle grade, ages 8 and up]
4. Horace and Morris but Mostly Dolores by James Howe
Three best friends are inseparable until that fateful day when they have to hang out based on their gender. Dolores is having none of it because it’s just too boring and she misses her best friends. They are having a rough time without her as well. The status quo is broken finally when Dolores takes a stand and she gets unexpected backup. [picture book, ages 4 and up]
3. Best Friends for Frances by Russell Hoban
Another best friend problem is when you are a girl badger and your best friend Albert is a boy badger who doesn’t seem to include you when his male friends are around. Not to worry, Frances has a plan to fix everything. It’s a little sneaky, but, you know Frances, it’s a good plan. [picture book, ages 4 and up]
2. Violet Raines Almost Got Struck By Lightning by Danette Haworth
Violet’s world is upside down when her best friend seems to have acquired another friend who is slightly ahead on the puberty thing. The thing is Violet is not sure she wants to grow up that fast. Why is everything so different and confusing all of a sudden? Why can’t things stay the same? And her best friend, who is caught in the middle wants to know why can’t everyone get along?! [middle grade, ages 8]
1. Owen and Mzee: The True Story of a Remarkable Friendship by Craig Hatkoff
A baby orphaned hippopotamus befriended by a giant, ancient tortoise? This true friendship rocks the animal world because it’s so unlikely yet so real. An amazing and uplifting story and you have to read it. [non-fiction, ages 4 and up]
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p.s. Related posts:
Picture Books for Toddlers About Being a Good Friend
Picture Books Celebrating Imagination and Friendship
30 Days of Ramadan: Understanding Our Friends #30DaysRamadan
Books for Kids Whose Best Friend Moved Away
Animal Friendship Picture Books
Nina Soni, Former Best Friend GIVEAWAY!
Follow PragmaticMom’s board Multicultural Books for Kids on Pinterest.
Follow PragmaticMom’s board Children’s Book Activities on Pinterest.
My books:
Amazon / Signed or Inscribed by Me
Amazon / Signed or Inscribed by Me
Food for the Future: Sustainable Farms Around the World
- ⭐ Starred review from School Library Journal!
- Junior Library Guild Gold selection
- Massachusetts Book Award Long List
- dPICTUS 100 Outstanding Picture Books of 2023
- Chicago Library’s Best of the Best
- 2023 INDIES Book of the Year Awards Finalist
- Green Earth Book Award Long List
- Nautilus Silver Winner, Nonfiction Children’s Picture Book
- Imagination Soup’s 35 Best Nonfiction Books of 2023 for Kids
Amazon / Barefoot Books / Signed or Inscribed by Me
Amazon / Scholastic / Signed or Inscribed by Me
I like how you included books for a wide range of ages.
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