Sark, How to Really Love a Child,

How To: Really Love a Child (poem) by SARK

How to Really Love a Child by Sark

From The Bowen Cookbook from 1994.  There was one “recipe” included by a parent that I thought you might enjoy.

How to Really Love a Child *

Be there.

Say yes as often as possible.

Let them bang on pots and pans.

If they’re crabby, put them in water.

If they’re unlovable, love yourself.

Realize how important it is to be a child.

Go to a movie theater in your pajamas.

Read books out loud with joy.

Invent pleasures together.

Remember how really small they are.

Giggle a lot.

Surprise them.

Say no when necessary.

Teach feelings.

Heal your own inner child.

Learn about parenting.

Hug trees together.

Make loving safe.

Bake a cake and eat it with no hands.

Go find elephants and kiss them.

Plan to build a rocket ship.

Imagine yourself magic.

Make lots of forts with blankets.

Let your angel fly.

Reveal your own dreams.

Search out the positive.

Keep the gleam in your eye.

Encourage silly.

Plant licorice in your garden.

Open up.

Stop yelling.

Express your love.

A lot.

Speak kindly.

Paint their tennis shoes.

Handle with caring.

*Copyrighted to SARK

p.s.  If you like this poem, you might like Just Playing by Anita Wadley (for parents of young children).

By Mia Wenjen, PragmaticMom


  1. I love this poem. Thanks so much for sharing!

  2. sybil brown

    loved the poem thanks

  3. This is fun. Thanks for passing it along. I would add play music. It always calmed my daughters, especially my youngest.

  4. I just read this in the doctor’s office last week when taking my son for a sick visit. It made me smile and reminded me of how important it is to show them lots of love.
    thx for sharing

  5. Ann

    Gosh, I don’t know what it is about this week but I am getting emotional like every second!!! Thanks for the poem and its advice – I know I do these things but I could always do more!!!

  6. jENIE

    love it!! thnks for sharing!

  7. Kim

    Love this!!

  8. Patty Wellman

    I have loved this poem for years! I saw a poster of it previously and it had little hand-drawn pictures of each item in the poem, do you know anything about how I might obtain one of those posters?

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